it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize