You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
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