well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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