Bisexual people are plain selfish.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Randomize
