In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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