no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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