i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
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