8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
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