porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Randomize
