you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
