All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
