We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
