Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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