No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize