I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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