People in love make me want to vomit
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
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