My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
either way he was missing a nipple.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
