i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
