dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Randomize
