Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
