we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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