Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize
