We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Randomize
