So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Please, let me fuck your mom
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Randomize
