I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
