seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Randomize
