I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize
