had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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