Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
tell me about the fingering
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
