he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
