weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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