i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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