is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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