I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
