ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
