Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
