Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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