my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
is it fun? or sober?
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
