He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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