she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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