whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
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