is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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