Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
