No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
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