Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
