He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
