Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
