I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
