Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
