whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
