yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
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